Doing the Sock-Hop of Shame

ME:  I am afraid to knit socks.  There.  I've said it.
SOCK GURU: (We all know one.  Pick your favourite.):  What are you afraid of?  Failure?
ME:  No.
SOCK GURU:  Turning a heel?
ME:  Nope.
SOCK GURU:  Toe issues?
ME:  Wrong again.
SOCK GURU:  Sock yarn and tiny needles?
ME:  No.
SOCK GURU:  Asymmetriphobia?
ME:  Huh?
SOCK GURU:  Fear of asymmetrical objects.
ME:  Don't care about that.  The differenter the better.
SOCK GURU:  Differenter?  DIFFERENTER?
ME:  I. Like. Odd. Socks.
SOCK GURU:  There's only one other thing that comes to mind.  Do you get ladders between the needles? 
ME:  GAH!  {Weeping uncontrollably now}.

SOCK GURU:  Have you tried pulling the first two stitches on each needle really snugly?
ME:  Yes.  Didn't work.
SOCK GURU:  Sometimes, the "ladder" will disappear when the sock is finished and you wash it for the first time.
ME:  As Richard Dreyfuss said in "What About Bob", "You know I can't live with that kind of ambiguity, Fay!!!"
SOCK GURU:  Have you tried the "magic loop" method.
ME:  Okay, you've got my interest...  No.  I haven't.  But I'm willing to give it a go.

Stay tuned, Guru.  Casting on with a 32" circular...